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E-Newsletter
December 2009
 Dear Friends,
We have a busy year ahead! There are a number of new initiatives which may interest you.Click the links for more info.
Inspired by the efforts of our New Zealand contemporaies, the Australian Catholic Marriage and Family Council has published a St Valentine's Day resource for parishes and dioceses.
Dip into some online discussion on our Facebook page.
Vino & Vespers is the name of a promotional events that we are running to raise the awareness of the marriage related resources among clergy.
The Renaissance of Marriage Conference 2010 is fast approaching. It promises to be even more relevant and thrilling than our 2008 conference.
Also included in this E-news are the most recent editions of Smart Loving and CathFamily.
And may we take this opportunity to wish you all a joyous Christmas season,
Be blest!
Francine & Byron Pirola
Directors of Marriage Mission, PMRC Australia.
A resource kit including liturgy notes, tips for building a marriage friendly community, and a reproducible handout celebrating St Valentine's Day has been developed by the Australian Catholic Marriage and Family Council. We include here the cover letter from Bishop Eugene Hurley.
Dear Friends,
Few would question the gift that a loving, stable marriage brings to the family and wider community. Indeed, research findings confirm that marriage provides benefits to both the couple and their children. And yet, loving, stable marriages don’t attract a lot of attention from church and community organisations until they become unstable. It is thus vitally important that we make frequent use of opportunities to affirm marriage and highlight the value of a loving marriage to the community.
In recent years, St Valentine’s Day has become increasingly secularised. ‘Saint’ has been dropped from the title and the emphasis has shifted from romantic love in the context of life-long marriage, to romantic relationships of any persuasion. This parish initiative is a bold attempt to reclaim the sacred from the secular and use the innate joyfulness of the feast to promote and affirm marriage and life-long romantic love.
I invite you to use the resources enclosed to focus parish attention on the role of marriage and St Valentine.
Yours in Christ,
Bishop Eugene Hurley | Chairman, Bishops Commission for Pastoral Life
A St Valentine's Event in your Parish
Now is the time to talk to your parish priest about marking this event. Simple suggestions for the liturgy are available in the resoruce. In addition, you may like to organise something such as hosting a morning tea or glass of champagne after the Mass. Some communities host a parish dinner or organise group bookings at a local restaurant. Others celebrate with a BYO picnic.
Whatever you do, make sure you order some Embrace and Celebrate Love flyers to distribute at the Church. Order flyers: officeadmin@thepmrc.org
To access the St Valentine's Day Resource kit, visit the Australian Bishops Website
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We now have a facebook group! Join us and be part of online discussions, keep track of coming events and send info to your facebook network.
Don't have a facebook account? It's easy and it's free. Go to www.facebook.com and create an account on the sign up box. Have an account or crated one? Search <Celebrate Love (PMRC)> and or <Embrace (PMRC)>.
Discussion Topic Dec/Jan: Gifts of Love
This month we're talking about Gifts that speak powerfully of Love: what was the most loving gift you've received from your spouse/fiance. Tell us your story... we'd love to hear from you.
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 Vino & Vespers is a new promotional initiative aimed at raising awareness of the marriage programmes of the PMRC among our clergy and other parish leaders.
Beginning at 5pm in the evening, the events open with shared prayer (the Office) and include an update on the PMRC activities and resources while wine and canapes are served. If you'd like to support this initiative, please contact your local coordinators.
Dates:
Terrigal (Central Coast) - Fri Jan 29 Sydney (Summer Hill) - Tue Feb 9
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Renaissance of Marriage 2010
The Renaissance of Marriage 2010 will bring together dynamic and engaging speakers in Catholic Marriage formation. Start planning for how Renaissance 2010 could impact your parish and diocese.
October 1-3, 2010 | Baulkham Hills, Sydney
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Knot Yet #7
The Continuity Factor
Many people assume that what they do as singles will not affect their future marriage relationship. They see single life as the opportunity to ‘have some fun’ and ‘live it up’ before they ‘settle down’ to marriage.
Interestingly, recent research has given substance to what many commentators have been saying for decades: how one lives before marriage impacts the stability of the relationship after marriage. Premarital sex and cohabitation for example are two significant factors cited as contributing negatively to marital satisfaction and longevity*. It seems that ‘living it up’ before marriage has long lasting consequences well beyond the obvious risks of sexually transmitted infections or pregnancy.
Unhelpful habits formed during our single years can not always be so easily discarded once married. These habits can include anything from personal hygiene to sexual standards and relationship patterns. For example, those who make a habit of ending a relationship rather than dealing with a conflict will soon discover that ‘happily ever after’ doesn’t come to those who don’t invest in the relationship. Similarly, expectations of independent lifestyles established during singledom are not generally compatible with the exclusivity of marriage.
Marriage doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Marriage is the blend of the two individuals and all the life experience they bring to their relationship. Every significant past relationship influences the formation of each person’s character. We carry the wounds and riches of every relationship into our marriage where they either help or play havoc with our ability to freely give ourselves totally to our spouse. Those singles who protect their heart from unnecessary wounding and develop habits and attitudes that are compatible with marriage will be the ultimate winners.
* Ref: Heaton, Timothy. Factors Contributing to Increasing Marital Stability in the United States. Journal of Family Issues, Vol. 23 No. 3, April 2002 392, 409.
Knot Yet #8
Finding Me
When emerging adults in committed relationships are polled about why they haven’t yet married, a common theme is ‘the need to find themselves’. They don’t feel ready to give themselves totally in a marriage relationship because they are uncertain about their self-identity.
Their comments reflect an important social belief: People should be formed in their identity before they commit to marriage. Behind this belief is an assumption that marriage somehow suspends personal development or derails it. For certain, marriage will influence the formation of one’s identity. In fact, all significant relationships and experiences will contribute to some degree to the final result.
Psychologists suggest that the formation of identity consolidates by the age of thirty. After this time, it is essentially permanent. While some might see this a reason in favour of delayed marriage, the opposite is actually the case. Couples who marry in their early to mid twenties will tend to form their identity as a husband or wife. If they have children sooner rather than later, this will consolidate their identities as father and mother.
This gives them an advantage in the marriage satisfaction sweeps: forming an intimate and committed bond will be working with their self-identity rather than in opposition to it. It is difficult enough for long time singles to surrender their cherished freedoms and independence; it’s even harder when they feel they like their marriage is asking them to change their self-identity.
Byron & Francine Pirola
>> print friendly version and archive >> return to top
>> print friendly version and archive >> return to top
LWM Resource
A Total Gift of Self
A multimedia resource series exploring the biological, relational and theological implications of natural fertility management. Developed by LivingWell Media, the resource includes a comprehensive website, 33min DVD, 24 page booklet and Instructor resources.
- Booklet: 24 pages $2.50
- Individual Edition: $15
DVD + Booklet
- Instructor Edition: $55
DVD (group viewing license)
+ Booklet
+ Instructor resources (Lesson Plan, Reproducible Couple
Handout, Instructor Notes, and Discussion Slides)
Not For Resale- Bulk Order Range
Also available in bulk-order discounts to marriage educators and agencies for free distribution or inclusion in course materials.
- Booklet: $1.20 (min order 50)
- DVD/Booklet Combo: $5 (min order 20)
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What's On 2010
Celebrate Love
Seminar for married couples
 Australia
NSW:
Sth Highlands: Feb 27/28
Central Coast: TBA
Wagga Wagga: Mar/May TBA
QLD:
Mount Isa: TBA
Gold Coast: May 15/16
WA:
Perth: Mar 27
 New Zealand
Wellington: 2010 TBC
Christchurch: 2010 TBC
 Great Britain
New Maldon: Mar 6/7
 Uganda: TBA
Embrace
Preparing to Live in Love
A six session programme for couples preparing to marry in the Catholic Church.
Offered in several formats:
- Mentoring available anytime.
- Mentoring by Correspondence (remote areas only).
- Small Home Groups available in selected areas.
- Group Intensives (includes self-directed online sessions, one day group seminar, 1 mentor session).
- Sydney, NSW
Feb 21 | May 23 | Aug TBA
Sep 26 | Nov 7
- Central Coast, NSW
May 3 | Jul 25 | Oct 24
www.Embrace.org.au
Mentor Training
Embrace
Offered when there is sufficient demand, this training is open to any Celebrate Love couple and is a great way to refresh and renew your marriage. Those who agree to become Mentors will be provided with all the support materials required to run the course.>> More Info
Promotion
Help spread the word
We send parishes and schools regular emails requesting that they advertise our seminars and courses in their bulletins. For many schools and parishes, this is not effective as they do not know who we are. It makes a tremendous difference if someone known to the school or parish can make contact with the office and alert the staff to the programmes. If you think you could help by speaking with your parish or school staff, please download a bulletin ad for your region from our Media Resource centre.
www.thepmrc.org/media
Promo Resources available:
- Posters- CL
Print from the web here or order from the PMRC office
- Flyers – CL/ Embrace
Order from the PMRC office
- Bulletin Ads – CL/Embrace
Download from the web here
- Pulpit talk outline
Download from the web here
- Promo DVD – CL
Download from the web here
- Promo DVD – Embrace
Suitable for priests & parish leaders- view here
View the CL promotional DVD (approx 2 mins, click here to view).
LivingWell Media
Books & Resources
for Catholic Families
A selection of CDs & DVDs are available including Keynote addresses from the Living the Dream Conference, Christopher West and Byron & Francine Pirola.
www.LivingWellMedia.com.au
Gathering Notes
& Other Resources
To access Gathering Notes and other resources to enrich your marriage or support your work in Celebrate Love and Embrace, visit:
www.thepmrc.org/gatherings
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